So, this last week I’ve had a taste of what life without my Mom would be like. IT TOTALLY SUCKS.

My Mom is one of my very best friends and we talk on the phone at least two or three times a week. We’re close to the same size and are now in the business of swapping clothes (or of me giving her my clothes in order to help her get away from the dreaded “Mom Jeans.” You know the ones of which I speak) she is my personal decorator, nurse/physician and confidante. She is seriously one of the coolest people in the whole world. She cooks, she builds stuff, she demolishes stuff, she camps, she lives in Tee-pees (you heard me), she skis, she listens, she owns her own successful business, she defends me, she tells me when I’m being stupid, she’s brilliant and she runs marathons for FUN, people. Try living in the shadow of THAT! Ok it’s not that bad. She’s uber supportive and has always made me feel like I could fly if I wanted it badly enough. She’s truly amazing.

All that being said, she’s on my list this week. She’s been roughing it on a river trip with my brother for six days and HER CELL PHONE DOESN’T GET RECEPTION. I’M DYING OVER HERE!

I have some horrible form of the plague that has taken up residence in my nasal cavities and throat and none of my usual medications are helping. I absentmindedly picked up the phone to call her from the always confusing drug aisle of the grocery store and as it went straight to voicemail I realized that I have NO IDEA what medicine to get without her. *Sob, cough, sneeze, sob*

I am in the process of finding paint for my family room. From Lowe’s, I absentmindedly picked up the phone to call her and as it goes straight to voicemail I realize that I can’t POSSIBLY pick out paint without her!! *Sob, leave walls white, sob.*

I found an unbelievable deal on her new favorite jeans, and I picked up the phone to call her . . . luckily I remembered she fell off the face of the earth and there’s no way for me to get a hold of her. She just missed out on great jeans! Take that, camping trip Mom.

I have decided that my Mom can never move anywhere that cell phones don’t work AND she’s never allowed to die, because I will cease to function as a human being. It’s sad but true.

Mommy? Come back soon!