Well, apparently the fact that I haven’t been skiing for six or seven years caught up with me yesterday because, OW.

Let’s just say that I’m glad it was all free because had I paid the $150 or so it would have cost me to go skiing yesterday I would have been pissed. I mean, it was still fun because it was skiing and it was beautiful weather and great snow for the end of April, but I had some issues.

Issue #1 is that I haven’t been skiing in a long time. I didn’t forget how or fall down (not even once!) or anything . . . I was just tentative and a little uptight, especially the first run.

Then, issue #2 was the boots. My first pair of ski boots made me loose all feeling below my knees within about ten minutes. I traded them in for bigger ones before going up the tram, and then noticed my toes were hitting into the front my first time down the mountain. Also, the right boot was so tight on my calf that it was cutting off circulation to my brain and when I loosened it, it didn’t improve. I thought it was because my form was SO BAD as I did the pie down the hill — which took and hour and a half just for the back side of the mountain where I wussed out and took the tram down for lunch.

After lunch we went back up and I discovered that my boots were the devil. It was the most painful hour of my life thus far. As I got more confident and increased my speed and improved my form (skiis can stay somewhat parallel? What?) my toes were smashing into the front of my boot, my right calf and right foot had no feeling left and (not related to bad boots) my left knee felt as though I had turned my entire leg around below the knee and was skiing that way.

Let it be known that I am an idiot pansy because after my second run, I gave up.

It should be noted that I did get three full hours of skiing in. It should also be noted that we only had time for one more run before the last shuttle left, and by the time I went down the mountain, traded in my ski boots and took the tram back up the mountain, I wouldn’t have had time to do another run.

Still, I totally quit. I am a sore, tired, wussy, skiing loser. And I am ashamed.